Things I have been doing lately:
- Head-butted owner's cup of tea causing it to spill over magazine, chair cushion, table and owner's clothing
- Hid under a bamboo bush in the garden and refused to make my presence known or come in when called whilst my owner was frantically searching for me
- Chewed wire on new telephone
- Hogged middle of the bed in the night and created furnace like heat meaning my owner was forced to lie on edge of the mattress with duvet off trying to cool down
- Bird-watched blackbirds, starlings and pigeons as they have got excited about arrival of Spring
- Attacked a woodlouse but gave up within two seconds as most uninteresting when it plays dead, what a spoilsport
- Shown lack of interest in posh brand of 'Beef' flavoured cat food ... hopefully not horsemeat
- Given my owner some kneading sessions in attempt to assist with her high blood pressure
- Sat on owner's chest preventing her from reading this month's book club selection - Margaret Forster's Keeping the World Away.
