Back once again with the ill behaviour

Well I've been having quite a week of ill behaviour although I've been let off as the tall kneading-cushion person was a little concerned that I might be a bit under the weather.  Apart from drinking the contents of the toilet, I managed to drape a poo over the coffee table to greet my owner on her arrival downstairs in the morning.  I vomitted grass sick on the rug downstairs, vomitted food sick on the carpet upstairs and am refusing to eat my wet food although I am carefully licking the nice gravy off it first before I sign it off to the rubbish bin.  My behaviour is normal it is just the not eating my wet food and the vomitting that is setting my owner on edge slightly.

Still I'm better behaved than Ms Polly's cat Augustus who likes to bang the craniums of his prey on my owner's nieces doors in the middle of the night and managed to push through Miss Tabitha's doors with a live blackbird in the early hours which flew around her head in the dark.  Ghastly!

The Golden Bowl

Not sure the author Henry James had this in mind when he wrote The Golden Bowl ...?

Oldest girl in the village?

Treacherous behaviour on the part of my owner.  I have discovered from sniffing her clothing that she has been consorting with other felines.  She has been giving food, cleaning out litter trays and giving away attention that should SOLELY be reserved for my good self to Madame Jakey in the village.  Jakey is a very elderly girl and likes to have a good shout at visitors as you can see from the attached picture.  She may be old but she is not stupid and was having none of her pills despite owner trying to hide them in Webbox treats and turkey ham.  In between the shouting she did a bit of purring and delayed my owner returning home to my splendid self.  I sought revenge on my owner for her shocking neglect by fiercely nipping her hair and sharpening my claws on her sheet at the head of pillow at midnight, 3.30 am and finally at 4.52 am until I got her out of bed.

Rotund cats from little acorns grow

Small acorns to ...

rotund cats.  Who's been eating all the pies?

Who let the cats out ... nobody

Now that Spring has Sprung in a half-hearted manner, I am finding that I am wanting to be outside in the fresh air more than normal.  However, I am finding my owner is rather slow on the uptake regarding letting me out.  She did try and train me to use a strange swinging flap contraption at another house but I thought it was beneath my dignity to pass through a heavy piece of plastic that would bash me on the head, so she has not bothered to install one of these thingymejings in her own abode, thank goodness.  I therefore have to either screech at her with much gusto to inform her that I wish to be let outside or I try another tactic of standing on my back legs and bashing on the door with my front paws.  Eventually she usually gets the drift but she can be a little obstructive at times.

Missing Moses

Disappeared for a long time on Tuesday evening and gave my owner quite a scare.  She checked the bamboo bush in the back of the garden, she called me and shook the Royal Canin food bag.  This conjured up Lily the neighbourhood white cat with black blotches who obviously thought she was in for a tasty treat but no Moses.  Owner put shoes on and went for a cat hunt.  I was located, by my collar tag glinting in the darkness, half way up a footpath that runs along the side of the house having a face-off with Fluffy, a long-haired female tabby that belongs to neighbours Pat and Mike.  We must have been having a turf-war stare-off for a good 45 minutes.  I was initially reluctant to walk towards my owner and when I did Fluffy had a swipe of me.  Slightly embarrased by admitting defeat to a girl cat I diverted on return to own property into other neighbour's drive where the dog is usually to show machismo but fortunately the Spinone was not in evidence.

Poor Moses the pug dog in Ireland is not so lucky and is missing.  http://www.doglost.co.uk/dog-blog.php?dogId=49850&status=Lost.  Hope nobody has stolen him and he comes home soon.  Owner went to Crufts last Saturday and found it really worrying how many dogs are being stolen in the UK.

Spring it is a Comin' In

Watching dem beautiful blackbirds chirrupin' in the morning sun of Stratford-upon-Avon.