Die Drei Katzen Schwartzen

Well here I am trying to catch up with the latest episode of "Cats Do The Stupidest Things" on the old googlebox.  Hang on a minute, this isn't me! Who the Great Houdini is it in MY house, on MY floor, standing on MY tv stand?  Outrageous.  Oh, I remember now. I bashed the Tall One about at 5.10 am in order to be let outside and then went off for my morning gallivanting - possibly involving pooping in someone else's garden.  Whilst I was out the Tall One caught up with her domestic duties and was doing the washing up when she glanced sideways to find a medium size black cat tucking into my dried food bowl.  Upon being espied she/he mewed pitifully in a ''I've wandered far from home and can't find my way back thither in this thick fog.  As you can tell from my face, which is wearing a large amount of vegetation and cobwebs, it is possible that I've been stuck in someone's shed and have only just been released and therefore require shelter and sustenance from the elements".  The Tall One being the pathetic softie that she is took pity on the traveller from afar and brushed the dust away from its face where it took delight in feeling the soft touch of human compassion upon it once again.  It then proceeded to jump about the kitchen counters with glee only jumping off to explore the living room whereupon it caught scent of my catnip toy and rollie-pollied all over it before having a look at the tv to check whether anything interesting was upon before it settled down on the rug.  It was at this point that I made my reappearance from outside and was frankly taken aback when I saw another cat making itself at home in my house and I found myself frozen to the spot in shock.  Luckily the intruder had the good sense to scarper before I could box it about the ears and I had to take myself off to my cat bed to cover from this startling effrontery.  This is the second black cat that keeps coming near my house and then I met a third in the Paradiesgarten.

I hope to recover in time for another exciting evening of throwing myself at the long-legged insect winged things that seem to have had a population explosion over the past couple of days and keep flying into the house.  The Tall One is thankful for my efforts on this part as she can't stand the Daddy Long Legs.