Lookie-here. It was the Tall One's first day back at work on Tuesday after the Christmas break, so in order to prepare her for this occasion I decided to test her response rates. Exactly at three o'clock in the morning I jumped up on the bed and landed squarely on her chest. I then nipped her wrist, inserted my claw in her nostril and firmly clasped my teeth through her hair onto her scalp. Normally, I can be dissuaded from such activity by several minutes of wrestling. However, this time I wasn't taking no for an answer and the Tall one got quite alarmed that she'd left the iron on, there was a fire somewhere or that someone was trying to break in as I was so insistent. After much door rattling and pacing the Tall One returned to bed. I then took this as my cue to do some stomach heaving and returned the food on her carpet that I had eaten earlier that evening. Did she not know that I was telling her I was about to throw up? A few wet wipes applied to the carpet later the Tall One returned moaning about "blasted stains". I examined the area and had to concur with her that indeed the carpet now featured a patch a shade darker, so I decided to accessorize further by going outside, eating some grass and then promptly regurgitating that a few inches away from my sick pile. All was not lost however, as the Kewley-Grettons kindly sent the same day some very clever Christmas mice in stockings in the post. I threw them about and chomped on their heads several times and then carried them upstairs to the bedroom. As you can see, with a wave of my wand and a shout of 'obscuro' I can magic the stains away with careful placement of Phyllis & Dillis. I am immensely proud of my interior design skills.
